Plop plop fizz fizz

Over the last several months I've developed a semi-serious reliance (I avoid the word addiction) on Alka Seltzer Nighttime Cold.  It's the most amazing medicine I've ever taken, hands down.  I took it last night before bed when I felt a little scratchy-throated and icky no doubt due to our 30 degree temperature drop last week.  I admit, it does cause me to wake up in the middle of the night in a confused state of euphoric blurriness.  (It's kind of like the confusion you felt when Saved By the Bell writers sent Jesse on a year-long sabbatical and replaced her with the biker beeyotch Tori and expected no one to notice...you know, the confusion that is quickly replaced with a distraction.  This distraction being that I felt amazing, and not at all sick anymore).

Last week during one of our many trips to Walgreens, (I love living a city that contains no convenient Wal-Mart) J says to me, "Are you out of your Alka Seltzer?" and of course I was, so we headed over to retrieve the lovely box of this overworked-underslept gal's best friend.  When--what's this?  They've slapped a notice on the box warning parents about teen drug addiction.  On MY box of Alka Seltzer Nighttime Cold?  Nonsense.  I'm not addicted.  I could quit anytime I want.  In fact, tonight I'm not taking any of my magical effervescent sleep-bringers.  

Nope.  I'm taking Unisom.